Farm Fun

Duck Jokes

Why did the duck cross the road?
- He was tied to the chicken.

At what time does a duck wake up?
- At the quack of dawn.

What do ducks have with soup?
- Quackers

What do ducks watch on TV?
- Duck-umentaries!

Where did the duck go when he was sick?
- To the ducktor!

A rabbit and a duck went to a restaurant for dinner. Who paid?
- The duck because he had the bill.

What do you call a crate of ducks ?
- A box of quackers!

What is a duck's favorite dance ?
- The quackstep!

What happens when ducks fly upside down ?
- They quack up!

What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework ?
- A firequaker!

1st duck: Quack
2nd duck: I was going to say that.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
- To get to the other side

Why did the turkey cross the road?
- To prove he wasn't chicken

Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
- Because chickens hadn't evolved yet

Why did the horse cross the road?
- Because the chicken needed a day off

Why did the squirrel cross the road?
- Because he was stapled to a chicken
(This is the punk rock version)

Why did the chicken cross the playground?
- To get to the other slide

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud and
cross the road again?
- Because he was a dirty double-crosser

Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road?
- Because he didn't have enough guts

Why did the chicken cross the football pitch?
- He heard the referee calling fowls

Pig Jokes

How did the pig thief get caught?
- The pigs he stole were squealers.

Why are pigs always in fashion?
- They are sty-lish.

What do you call a pig who's been arrested for dangerous driving?
- A road hog!

What happened when the man stole a pig?
- The pig squealed to the police.

What does the little pig get every morning from his parents?
- Hogs and kisses!

What do you call a crafty pig?
- CunningHam

Why did the pig run away from the pig sty?
- He felt that the other pigs were taking him for grunted.

What does a pig use to write his term papers with?
- Pen and Oink!

What do you call a pig with no legs?
- A groundhog!

Why didn't the piglets listen to the teacher pig?
- Because he was an old boar.

Doctor, doctor, I've got a little sty.
- Then you'd better buy a little pig

Goat Jokes

What do you call an unemployed goat?
- Billy Idol.

What do you call a goat at sea?
- Billy Ocean.

What do you call a goat's beard?
- A goatee

Where do milkshakes come from?
- Excited goats

What do you call the best "butter" on the farm?
- A goat

Cow Jokes

Where do cows go on Saturday nights?
- To the MOOOO-vies

What is another name for a cow?
- A lawn mooooer!

What do you call a sleeping bull?
- A Bull-dozer!

Llama Jokes

Why did the llama cross the road?
- It was the chickens day off!

What did the llama say to the blade of grass?
- It was nice knawing you!

Farm Animal Cartoons

Can't get dafter than these two!
No place like home!
Oh boy! Long drop!
Goat in sudden shock!
Stubborn goat!
I think i'm stuck!
I will get it! I will get it!
Portrait of a cow
John Cow'volta'
Not a pleased bull!
Over enthusianstic dancing cow!
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